This blog post is a recap of the last 20 month of my life and how I learned to fly.
Well, for starters didn’t see any of that coming. Even in my wildest dreams, I didn’t expect for this to happen. I didn’t expect to start this transformation, this Journey. I didn’t expect to grow so much on a personal level. I didn’t expect to get so confident, hopefully not cocky. I have developed so many new skills. I have taken and faced so many challenges. I have failed so many times and then started again. I have built so many valuable connection on all different levels. I have really started to enjoy going to job interviews. I have proved to myself that I really can be a different person. I can be proactive and energetic. I can be creative. It was probably the first time I have ever thought of myself as a creative person and it felt incredible. I have always tagged myself as a critical realist but it all changed drastically over the last 20 months. That’s just a tip of the iceberg. But let’s go back to the beginning of this Journey.
As you know right now for almost four year I was working as a sales representative in one of the big banks. It was by far the toughest years of my life. I had extremely bad days every second week, if I was lucky. If I wasn’t so lucky it could go on for days or weeks incessantly. For a long time, I was in a very dark place.
There was a specific day when I was still working there which I will never forget. It was by far the most important day of my life. The day of the Decision. I have listened to Tony Robbins audiobook Awaken the Giant Within twice in previous three months but nothing in that particular day showed how significant it will soon become. After very intense, stressful and embarrassing phone call with my boss I have said to my friends at work that it is my last day there. I will not be working here anymore. I’ve had it. Enough. Immediately I felt a mighty relief. Transcendental freedom. I felt powerful and in full control. My fear and my overwhelming stress were gone. I have never felt anything close to that before. It felt like reached the bottom and bounced back up. As cheesy as it sounds I saw a light and colors of life for the first time in many years. I went to be there for the next two weeks during the termination of agreement at my request. I was finally out. I have finally made the Decision and I’ve followed thru. Since than my life has changed in many aspects.
Without previous experience in the field, without any knowledge or education, being a little bit too old and over experienced I have been given a chance by one company. Dansk Supermarked. Little that I know how much this will change my life. The only thing that I was looking for at that time were normality, clear goals, stability and a little bit of peace of mind to do my job. The last thing that I was looking for was a chance to grow. Luckily, I found much more than just that.
It’s not the job of being an accountant itself that gave me so much but there are few things that I need to mention. Besides everything that I was looking for like normality, clear goals and stability, I wanted to avoid one thing. Unnecessary stress. This stress free. It didn’t give me even a bit None. Null. Zero. After experiences of previous four years this was a huge change, mighty relief and nice surprise for me. It turned out that you actually can live without being disregarded, offended and kicked in the face every day. This one thing allowed me to start getting back on my feet mentally. After four years of being devoured and destroyed my self-confidence was like a phoenix rising from the ashes. I have built my confidence to a level that I though was never possible for me.
The fact that I didn’t have to deal with all that madness gave me spare mental resources to develop and time to awake my hunger. Hunger for knowledge, for experiences, for different points of view. Without a special plan or vision in mind I was absorbing knowledge from many different fields. Accounting, economy, psychology, education, marketing, project management, new technologies and many more. What’s specially very funny I’ve learned much more about investing and how banking system works after I left it. Awakening of this hunger for knowledge allows me feel progress and growth on a daily basis.
Eyes wide open
Along all this, I have become amazed be mindfulness and self-awareness, and the part they play in the quality of our life. It allowed me to enjoy and cherish the smallest things in life. Now my life and my happiness are truly in my hands and my hands only. Bit by bit, step by step, day by day, I learn to love my life even harder. Living consciously allowed me to enjoy every bit of life with my eyes wide open.
Learning to fail
First time in my life I started to take challenges not only to win but even more to fail and learn. I failed at a few different job interviews in and outside of the company. For a couple of month, I was working on two different business and failed. Day and night for about a month I was working on business plan without even trying to implement it. Starting many personal challenges and failing again and again. As trite as it sounds every failure brings a lesson. Sometimes very tiny but it’s always there. We have to be extremely persistent and determined to find it but it’s worth every try.
I feel that I took to the best the chance that I have received and gave my best in return. It was just a start of a beautiful personal development Journey for me. This is how I fly. And I never want to give it up.
Thanks for reading! 🙂
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