POWER OF QUESTIONS? PART 1 START FROM YOURSELF

Posted Leave a commentPosted in 6 minute read
OVERCOMING FEAR OF FAILURE. PART 1

Sometimes the questions are complicated and the answers are simple – Dr. Seuss

I have an impression that many of us have lost the ability to ask question. Did we ever have it? Sure we did. Let’s go back to the times when you were a little kid. You were asking so many questions that I bet that there was moment when your parents could stand it anymore. But they did. You were a little broken record and you did it totally on purpose. Surprised? Let me tell you what you were doing. You were asking the same question 20 or 30 times looking for a different answer. Until you found one that satisfied you, you wouldn’t stop asking. Try to think how annoying that was. We need to be annoying again. We have let it vanish too easily.  

 

Question yourself

 The first person you need to ask questions is yourself. Ask yourself the same question 20 times? I bet you are going to come up with better answers. When was the last time when you asked yourself a question What do I want? What’s my outcome? What’s my true KPI? What’s the result I am after? Not what should you do. Activity may change but stick to your outcome. Focus on your result. The clearer you are about your goal the faster you will achieve it. Think about the outcomes, not activities.  You will find that you can eliminate some of your activities because they are not getting you closer to achieving your desired outcome.

 

Going into details

In order to see clearly what you are truly after you need to constantly ask yourself those question.  What are my most important outcomes for this week? What do I want to accomplish today? Be as clear and specific as possible. What are the outcomes for this meeting? Do we want our company to be focused on the outcomes or activities? What do you want to change in your life? What are you really missing in life? What do you want to accomplish? What is your goal? Do you even know it? How can you hit target you cannot see? How can you reach a goal you do not have?

 

Why?

Are you going to work, train or grind tomorrow because that’s what you did yesterday?  If that’s your reason, you will not get any closer to the vision you do not have.  We have all the means to stop it. Break this pattern We live in. The first step to do is to know your WHY. You really need to know Why. Why do you want to do all those things? What do you expect when you reach that goal? What it is going to change?

 

Lord of your own fire

We all have or used to have fire inside of us. You need to light that fire again. To re-fire your desire first you need to ask certain questions.  What burns in your heart? What is your motive for action? What drives your life?

Those are a few very important questions you need to ask yourself in the beginning. Without knowing that you might achieve your goals and still be unhappy with the result because you didn’t know Why exactly did you wanted this. Does it make any sense thus far?

 

Get your priorities in order

The simplest as well as one of the most effective ways to evaluate and decide on your priorities, is to ask yourself a question: How this will affect you a week from now, a month from now, a year from now? Will this action cause a significant change? Does this get you closer to your vision?  There will always be something to clean at the house, something you need to do, some friends you haven’t seen for months. There will always be something. Don’t kid yourself.

 

Experts in other people

You probably think that it sounds easier, then it actually is. How do I add value to my life and to the life of others? First, you need to know yourself. Simple, right? Yes, it’s simple but most of us don’t know ourselves too well. We tend to study, discover, learn and get to know our friends, colleagues, our boss, but not ourselves. We look at them, we assess them, quite often judge their actions and behaviors, and in the end we evaluate their results. We have become experts at Them. Especially with our friends and bosses. He should act like that. He should say it in more convincing matter. She is such a week leader. She has got no skills. What about you? How well do you know yourself? How much attention do you pay to your thoughts, your behaviors, your results? Is that enough? Do you think you should know yourself better? I know I should.

 

Right questions add value

Ok, how to do? Start from asking yourself better questions and you will understand yourself a lot better.  Ask yourself 4 questions that will allow you to get to know you better:

  1. Your goals and dreams. What are your goals, your dreams, your vision? What do you want to achieve? What’s your expected outcome?
  2. People. Who are you trying to impact? Who and how needs to be involved in this endeavor? What do they want? Who would be affected by your actions? Who would be influenced?  Try to understand the Who of any given situation.
  3. Do you know how to do it? Do you have skills, knowledge and resources? What you can do and what you cannot do? What do you need to learn? Where do you need to grow?
  4. Measurement. How things are going to be measured? How do you know if you’ve reached your goal? How do you know if you are progressing? What is your Key Performance Indicator? How are you going to check that?  How does success look like for you?

 

I know that’s a lot of questions to ask yourself but believe me it’s totally worth it. Be persistent, be specific and invest in yourself.

 

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PATIENCE. PERSISTENCE. PRACTICE.

Posted Leave a commentPosted in 6 minute read
PATIENCE. PERSISTENCE. PRACTICE.

Patience, persistence and perspiration make an unbeatable combination for success – Napoleon Hill

Let’s say you have created that compelling vision we were talking about before. You thought through what your habits need to be. The level of your excitement and motivation is at its highest point. You have started your Journey and you practice your habits for a few weeks now. Everything is going great, you are in living your Journey but you cannot see any progress. You start to worry. Am I doing something wrong? Why I’m not progressing? Why I’m still so bad at it? When we start something new, very quickly we tend to look for any sign of progress. We are worried if you cannot find any. It supposed to be easier than it really is. After few hours of practice, we expect to be good at this. We want instant effect.

 

P&P – Patience and Persistence

Think about the time when you were learning any new skill, let’s say for example reading. It was probably long ago and since you’re reading this it means that you use that skill from time to time. Unfortunately, it’s not so obvious anymore. How long did it take you to be good at reading? Was it an hour, 5 hours, 10 hours? A day? A week? How about a month? No, it was a lot longer than that. You were practicing and practicing, hour after hour until you felt comfortable at reading. Your parents were encouraging you to keep on going. They said: Be patient. You’re going to learn. Keep on practicing.  They were convinced that you will succeed. Very often we forget about that when become adults. We forget about patience and persistence. We want it now and we want it easily. As silly as it sounds that’s the truth.

 

Practice! Practice! Practice!

What about learning how to drive a car? That should be a newer memory. Maybe it’s going to be easier for you to relate to. Were you a Formula 1 driver or even a taxi driver after a couple hours of practice? No way. But you didn’t stop practicing, did you? Did you saw massive results right away? Once you spend hundreds of hours behind the wheel it became your second nature. Well, for most of us. If you think about it for a minute, it was very complicated at the beginning. It required high level of focus and multitasking. You had to control the wheel, break, clutch, accelerator, road signs, situation on the road, other drivers and on and on. It seemed complicated but most of us became at least decent drivers. This is a great lesson most us of went through but it seems like we’ve got nothing out of it besides skill itself.  It should teach us that we need to be patient. Practice is not to be done once you become good, whereas it is required to become good. 

 

Talent is not everything

Another concept that is misinterpreted at the highest level is Talent. I believe talent is highly overrated and almost always it’s mistaken with hard work. On the other hand, hard work is grossly underpriced. Don’t get me wrong I believe in talent. It exists and its very important factor of success. It allows people to move faster and take bigger leaps towards success. But talent became one of the biggest excuses of our society. Talent without hours and hours of working on your craft will not get you anywhere. Most times what gets labeled as talent is hours and hours of hard work.

 

Potential

If you are indeed talented but you won’t be working your socks off, you will never be successful. Never. You will probably be off to a good start but you will never reach your potential. You will be one of those brief stories about wasted talent. We all know so many of them. Our friend form high school or college or our soccer team. We’ve seen it.  

 

Tenacity

While I was attending athletic high school there was a dedicated basketball class. They were playing really great and in the first year of high school they became national champions. Very quick success. Along those talented group of players were a guy who I was playing against just a year ago in a primary school game. He was not good at all.  Slow and not athletic enough. He had very little skills and even smaller understanding of the game. But he was on the team due to his size. I think he was about 200 cm (6 foot 7) in the 8th grade. That was quite a size for a high school kid in Poland. He was not the star of that high school team. During and after high school most of the players from that team went to play for a local team in one of the lower leagues. One by one they were resigning and jumping from that basketball train. Until he was the only one left. I don’t think you can say that he was very talented but what you must see is how persistent he was. He worked really hard. He didn’t quit. In 2015 he was the first player for that high school team who debuted in the highest ranked polish basketball league. That is a great example of the power of persistence and it can easily be an inspiration to keep on grinding. Results will come you just need to be patient.

 

What about results?

But how long do we have to wait for results? We often say or at least hear the statement I’m tired of waiting. All of us look out and search for progress. From the time we were little kids we were told that Hard work pays off. If you work hard you will see results. I believe this statement is both true and false. If you still think you will see progress, growth and improvement almost every day then you haven’t been paying attention to your life. It never works this way. It may happen by accident but then it’s not a permanent progress. Most of us just quit during the process because of our lack of patience.

Are you patient? How much time are you willing to wait for the results?

 

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5 PEOPLE YOU SPEND MOST TIME WITH

Posted Leave a commentPosted in 7 minute read
5 PEOPLE YOU SPEND MOST TIME WITH

You are the average of Five People you spend most time with – Jim Rohn

Who do you want to be? Do you want to be like your friends? Are your friends aiming to be the same kind of person you want to be?

People with whom you hang out with will shape who you will become. You truly are the by-product of the 5 people you spend most time with. Audit your inner circle. Audit the 5 people you spend most time with.

 

Don’t adapt to negativity

Quite often the condition of our motivation depends largely on our environment. Examples are everywhere. Let’s look at some of your friends, who have quite similar goals and dreams. They are working their tail off to get ahead. You see them grind and fight. How would it affect your motivations? Would you be more motivated? Would you try harder? Would you be doing more than now? I’m not talking about being envious. It’s about pushing yourself further. If you surround yourself with people who are constantly in a negative state, who complain and gossip, they are going to kill your energy, your motivation and your happiness. Just like that. The more time you will spend with them, the more you will be like they are. That is a clear downside of our ability to adapt. If you will go grab a coffee with a friend who is constantly complaining, unless you are very mindful and mentally aware, you will adapt and play to this tunes. Now tell me who is your dinner or coffee buddy?

 

Cut them off

It’s stunning how much you we are affected by the five or six closest people to us. The dramatic trigger to your emotional success is disproportionally dependent on the people around you.  Eliminate people who are demolishing your ecosystem and are holding you back. That’s tough. Easy for me to say, right? Yes it’s easy to say, but I actually did it. But here’s the punchline, it doesn’t make it any less true or any easier.

 

It’s about you!

It sounds harsh but you need to cut yourself off from those people, because they are unconsciously working against your vision, your dreams and your Journey. Of course it’s not their fault, much less it’s yours. To be quite honest it not about them it is all about you and your dream. It means that most of you would have to curb your relations and interactions with about half of them. If someone is really making you feel bad keep your relations very brief and deliberate. If they grizzle habitually don’t do the same thing just to comfort them. I know you think it’s polite but it doesn’t serve anyone. Neither you nor them. Don’t do the same thing. If someone is raging, keep your composure. If you friend is eating junk food, don’t do the same just to keep them company. Audit yourself. Are you guilty of that? Are those your behaviors?

 

Dictatorship

There is no place for democracy when it comes to your emotion. You have to rule your emotions with an iron fist. Harness your emotions and your behaviors. Be decisive.

Don’t let others to arbitrarily change your state. You need to be aware that your motivation comes from the state you are currently in. If you will let yourself to the mental state of disappointment, depression, failure or sadness, your motivation will vanish suddenly. You can actually make yourself happy or miserable regardless of what is happening around you.

Tranquil, composed and healthy both mental and physical states are essential to refueling your motivation. Your state is like a gas station with a direct connection to a drilling platform. You can have all that motivation hidden under the surface, in you and around you, but without distributing point you will not be able to use it.

 

What if it’s not so good?

It’s fair to say that it’s easy to be motivated when everything is going your way or according to your plan. What if your worst day happen? How do you keep believing in your vison?  What happens when the Journey gets really hard and challenging? When you don’t know what to do? When you are frustrated or scared? How do you keep believing?

 

Story of a scapegoat

My whole carrier in banking, almost 4 years of my life, looked exactly like that. I had extremely bad days every second week, if I was lucky. If I wasn’t so lucky it could go on for days or weeks incessantly. For a long time, a was in a very dark place. Unfortunately, as sad as it sounds this happens to really many people for all different reasons. We had that saying at work, that out of the a few banking branches under our boss there had to be at least one scapegoat. No exception. That was based on our years of observations, research and whining. We all went through it couple times. When you were a scapegoat you were in this special kind of spotlight and it wasn’t anything good. Your every step, every decision, every meeting, every sales call had been judged. Everything you were doing was a terrible failure, even if it was a great success in fact. Going to a toilet was your personal failure. There was nothing you could about it. You had to write few extra report every single day to show what you were doing and why you were such lousy bungler. If you were unlucky you could have been told by your colleagues what the boss was saying about you when you left the room. It could go on like that for a few weeks.

 

Verge of change

There were a few times when I felt that I was on a verge of quitting but I haven’t go through with that though. I haven’t made that decision. I wanted to, but I haven’t had guts to do it. The worst day was the concept of my whole professional life. Every day was my worst day. No dreams, no vision and no future. Until it all changed and I jumped from that edge. I have cut that safety net which was holding me back. Now I intentionally put myself in situations when I must struggle. I love to push myself further than anyone else I personally know. I push myself from he edge.

 

Are you entitled to anything?

A few generations ago struggle was something that was truly horned by others. People build their character during their days of grind and hard work. Nowadays we live in convenient driven society. We love to do everything what’s easy and we are incredibly convinced that we are entitled to everything. We don’t have to earn that promotion or raise at work, we don’t have to earn that great body, we don’t have to earn respect and attention, we don’t have to earn and learn new skills. With all that being said and I know that there is something in you that really wants it.  Whatever it might be you have to go after it right NOW.

 

You are going to pay the bill

Be aware that your motivation is an absolute resource. Remember to be extremely mindful about the things that influence and affect your motivation charge bar. Last but not least you are responsible of your drive. It’s totally up to you to keep that fire burning. Are you going to throw a huge party with an open bar for your emotions for a bunch of people who just came here to drink for free or if it’s going to be a smaller meeting for people who build you up and who came here to give best of them? Regardless what you chose, you are going to pay that bill. I highly recommend you to audit your inner circle.

 

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EVERY LITTLE DECISION MATTERS

Posted Leave a commentPosted in 5 minute read
EVERY LITTLE DECISION MATTERS

Good habits are hard to form but easy to live with. Bad habits are easy to form but hard to live with – Ed Foreman.

A ritual or a habit is something you do consistently, usually at the same time, so it becomes automatic and unconscious. It actually takes about 30 days to form easier kind of habits. For harder, more complex ones it takes about 60 days in a row. After that time, it will be easier for you to do it, than not to do it. Is that so long? 30 to 60 days in the context of your entire life is just a blink of an eye. In the long run that life really is your every little decision matters.

Be aware that in the morning your willpower is at its strongest level so that is the best time to push yourself to act. Force yourself for the first 5 days and you will start to see that it eventually gets easier, and more and more automatic. Repetition. Repetition. Repetition.

 

Figure out yourself

Willpower doesn’t last but rituals can last a lifetime. You have some rituals in your life you have been doing for years, even though some of them don’t serve well. If you want a new life you need to change your habits. If you don’t know what are your current habits just ask the closest people around you and they will tell you in a hear bit. They probably know you better then you know yourself. They observe you. They study and evaluate you, and your actions. Are you surprised? Don’t be. Many of us spend most of our days thinking and talking about other people. But how much time do you spend on figuring out yourself? What drives you and gets you going? How do you operate? When you are most effective? There are some many other question to be asked but we never ask them. Start doing that right NOW!

 

Break it down

Break down your goals and desired behaviors into actionable items. Define them. You should also be very humble with yourself. Direction of your Journey is way more important than your partial results. Your Why is way more powerful than your goal. Habits are not about quick success. The longer it takes to succeed the longer it will last.

 

Micro-decisions

Habits are developed by making right decision in the beginning. It starts here! It starts from tons of micro-decisions done dozens of times a day. Rock by rock. Step by step. Day by day. Chose what’s good for you, not what just feels good.  All of you have those moments when your habits speak up for themselves. When you are at work and you see that vending machine with bunch of snacks or sodas. The voice inside you whispers: Hey, let’s have just one? It’s not going to hurt you. You’re not going to get overweight and unhealthy after eating just one snack. Well, we like to think that way. Just one. Why should I deny this pleasure to myself? We all need to enjoy life and have those little pleasures, don’t we?  You are right we need to enjoy life and have as many pleasures as we possibly can, but those little automatic behaviors have nothing to do with the real pleasure. How long does your happiness last when you eat a whole bar of chocolate every evening? A minute at large. Is it worth the results you will certainly get in the future? For me it’s not worth it. You’ve got to decide for yourself. There is nothing to discuss here.

 

40 000 steps

You allow your present self to hurt your future self. Don’t let it happen. We somehow like to think that success comes from taking huge leaps. Taking great risks and doing what is most important, am I right? From the perspective of this single act, it doesn’t really have any great consequences.  This one decision of eating that snack won’t really affect your health in any significant way. But your life is a marathon not a sprint. In that long run you are taking part, it’s really the only thing that matters. It takes about 40 000 steps on average to run a marathon, not a few humongous jumps.

 

Perseverance

The outcome of your run, your life and who you indeed become is the result of your every little decision compounded. Every little decision matters. The good news for you is that those little things are easy to do. It takes very little effort just make that choice. We are all capable of doing that. Believe me you can really do it. You can do it right NOW.

But the bad news is that since it’s so easy to do, it is also easy not to do, and just do what everybody else around you are doing. Let’s say you decide to do this little thing now. What will happen? You won’t be any healthier the next day, you won’t get the immediate result but after a year you would see huge benefits from it. It takes a lot of persistence and patience to see the results. The great thing is you can apply it to anything. Literally to whatever you want.  

 

Every little decision matters

You can do the things other people are doing all their life and say: It’s not like this little decision matters and you will externalize this unsuccessful mindset. The fact of the matter is that your little decisions make all the difference. Every little decision of yours, every practice, every sacrifice, every obstacle on the way will be compounded at the end. You are the final result of your actions and habits. Get your decision in line with your vision. The more you can do it the closer you will be to the person you really want to become. Take responsibility for where you are in life. Now is the best time to do it.  

 

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HABITS ARE YOUR WINGS

Posted Leave a commentPosted in 5 minute read
OVERCOMING FEAR OF FAILURE. PART 1

Until you spread your wings, you'll have no idea how far you can fly - Unknown

Your road to success is going to be just like a long flight. It won’t be a domestic 3-hour flight over lands you have seen before. No. Not even close. You will be flying over and landing in the deserts of motivation. You will crush it the jungles of failure. You will have to stop and fuel your tank in cold lands of pain. If you will be an arrogant and selfish pilot, you will land forever in the city of loneliness. 

If you want to end up somewhere else bear with me. First you need to have is a vision, a dream which will be the map to your destination. Motivation will make your plane take off, but to fly it and stay in the air you need to grow your wings, your solid foundation, your habits. Habits are your wings. Habits make you fly. To stay in the air and go towards your destination you need fill your tank constantly. Your positive emotions and attitude are your fuel. Trigger moments you’ve developed are your fuel pump. If you allow your tank to be empty you will stop, you will fail, you will crash. There is no doubt about that.

 

Rage

First step is to identify your emotional habits. You get what you tolerate. You say This is me. When all this is, is a habit. It’s a habit of how you look at life. How you use your body. The language that you use. My habit was to get mad every time something unexpected suddenly when very wrong. Especially, when it was not my fault. It doesn’t sound very good, but this was me. I had some moments when I was hitting and kicking the wall in a wild frenzy. Yep I’m not proud of that. I have even thrown my cellphone at work once. That mindset, that habit of momentary rage started long before my work in a bank. From when I can remember That was me. To fan the flames, I was always so competitive that I broke my tennis rackets in training couple times.

 

Lonely TNT

I was a walking time bomb. The funny thing is that I have never went to that state of being furious during a game, business call or a meeting. Never. Actually it happened only a few times in front of other people. The was due to the way I have subconsciously created my habit. It allowed me to get extremely mad only was I was by myself or with a person very close to me. All my friends including the closet ones always thought I was the uncommonly calm guy, who always keep himself cool. In almost all situations I was. The things, the problems which were making my friends stressed and frustrated were a piece of cake for me, but I had my own triggers and detonators. The biggest one was the unexpected change of my ‘so highly significant’ plans. Now it is hard for me to believe how deeply I was ingrained with that habit. This was causing so much pain to me and people closets to me. But I’ve never thought about getting it under control. I was not seeing it as a problem. It never crossed my mind. 

 

Get it under control

If you think closely and honestly about your life, about your reactions to different situations you will notice that you have your own negative habits. Sometimes even self-destructive like I had. I don’t want to hurt you, I want to make you aware of your reactions. Get them under control and then finally change them forever. To do it you need to train yourself psychically, the same way you train your body physically.

 

You get what you tolerate

All of us have bad days. That’s very normal. We often get frustrated but we don’t want to stay in that state.  It’s like a muscle and you choose to train yourself to be frustrated, stressed, or sad. We all need to avoid that kind of training. The more you do something the more wired you get. Instead you can condition yourself to feel passionate, strong, forgiving, humble, happy and strong. Don’t do what others do. Don’t settle for average. You get what you tolerate. It’s up to you regain control over your habits.

 

Designing new habits

Without working on, developing and preserving the best habits, it's impossible to succeed. But how to create new empowering habits?

First you need to clarify what your habit needs to look like to succeed. If you don’t know how to do it you, follow 4 steps below and write answers to each question.

  1. Choose an area of your life that you would like to improve, fix or build. Describe what that area looks like right now. What’s the reality? Be honest with yourself. How you want it to be and how it is now?
  2. There are certain rituals that got you here and will not let you go unless you break them apart. There usually is bunch of little things that you are doing consistently which sabotage your life. Write all the rituals that put you in the place you are now. What habits shaped your current circumstances? Now is the time to realize it and start making it right.
  3. Think about what is your dream, your vision for life? What is your irresistible fascination? What is your life’s destination? It’s about your vision, not anyone else. Don’t limit yourself. Be specific. You need to see it with your own eyes.
  4. Write down all the habits that will get you to your destination. What would you need to do differently each day to get where you want to be?

Now you can confront your reality with your desires. How does it look? Do your daily actions follow your words or your thoughts? Are you happy with your behaviors? Will it be enough?

 

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MOTIVATION IS NOT ENOUGH

Posted Leave a commentPosted in 7 minute read
motivation is enough
MOTIVATION IS NOT ENOUGH

Motivation is what gets you started. Habit is what keeps you going – Jim Rohn

I’ve learned on my own example what is the hidden power behind Decisions. I used to say I wanted to change my life (How to create change) but I never crossed the line in the sand. Many people fall into this trap just like I did. We say we want to change bur our actions show something completely different. We say we are motivated but motivation is not enough.

 

Decision

It doesn’t matter what you have started if you didn’t take to the end.

You don’t get in life what you want, you get what you are.  

What I can tell by my own experience is that it all starts when you DECIDE that there is no other way but your way. Paraphrasing words of Tony Robbins, you need to say to yourself: ‘I will not be a creature of circumstances I will be creator of my life’. Along your conscious decision there needs to come massive and consistent ACTION.

 

Misinterpretation

How do you think successful people get to where they are? Some of us subconsciously and others totally consciously misinterpret what we see in others. Well, not you, right?

Let’s think of an example. We all know a person who is calm, relaxed and purposeful. For most of us it might seem like those people are just like that. That’s just their character. There is nothing complicated to it, right?

Yes, that’s right. It easy I agree but we constantly fail to get it right. Every day we fail to recognize the hard work behind the outcome we see.

 

Unicorns

What we actually see is a result of conscious effort and self-control. Many people developed this habit in a very young age. Others are aware how their mind actually works and are able to control it. Many of those unicorns actually become massively successful. They know circumstances don’t make or change who you are, they just revel and magnify it. Why do you think we say: A friend in need is a friend in deed? That’s the easiest situation to see who’s who. Once you are in a serious need you’ll be able to match your friends action with their words. Your problems become the ultimate friendship test. Unfortunately, we all know so many people how didn’t pass it.

 

Motivation is not enough

Let’s say you’ve made that decision. You’re motivated to start, go all in, go all the way. Is motivation the only thing you need right now? Should you think about something else? What’s your next step?

Motivation by itself is not worth a penny. It will not take you anywhere. It will not get anything done. Motivation is not permanent just like eating and bathing.  Motivation gets you going, but what you need is action, discipline, commitment and strong habits. Motivation gets you going, but habit gets you to your outcome, your vision. Will motivation make you get up every morning at 4 or 5? NO but strong habits will.

 

Automatic behaviors

Most of you heard of habit, right? You know what habits are. But do you know everything you need to know to create and control them? Habits are defined as ‘behaviors done with little or no conscious thought’. They are deeply seeded automatic behaviors, triggered by certain anchors. Our life is full of habits and it’s about time you realize that.

 

Habit design

Outcomes throughout your life depend greatly on those daily habits. The most successful people are extremely aware of the power of habits. That is why their habits and daily routines are designed very specifically. They know what is making them act and perform on the highest level. They know their fuel and fire. They know what really gets them going.

 

How much time do you spend with you?

What is your fuel and fire? This is a very tricky question. It is not easy to give any answer and it’s even harder to get it right. To do it right you have to know yourself very well. Here we come to another very itchy subject for most of us. How much time do you spend just with yourself every day? You might say an hour, two hours or even more but that is so far from the truth. Cut off the time you spend in front of TV or your computer. This need to be silence time which you spend only with your thoughts. This is when you really get to know yourself. How about your average time now? It doesn’t look so good anymore, does it? 

 

Guaranteed benefits

This time is one of the biggest and certainly most profitable investment you can ever make. If you do it right in return for your time you will receive ideas, motivation, peace, joy, inner fire and success. Does it sound good enough as list of guaranteed benefits for this great product? So why haven’t you bought it yet?  

 

Why you are not in that game?

Everyone around you is trying to alter your behaviors and you’re not. You are the only person who’s not trying.  Are you surprised? The products and services you use habitually are designed to change or benefit from your habits. We all live in a world of infinite distractions trying to win our attention and the best companies are mastering this art. That is one of the greatest superpowers of today’s world. Those companies rely greatly on our daily routines and emotions. I can tell that once they get a hold of us we almost never disappoint them. Why? Because a great deal of your habits are externally manufactured by those companies. Those are habits you have created without your conscious approval so don’t feel guilty to change them. Even thou you are executing them every day they are not yours.

 

Shower without water

Having new goals without creating new habits is just like trying to shower without water. You will end up naked, cold, disappointed and no closer to your goal of being clean. Habits are the things that make you achieve your goal. Without constantly using that water you will end up lonely and unhappy.

Set up better habits, better routines, better strategies that you can run on a continual basis to keep you energize, enthusiastic and engaged. It’s easy to say, I know, but how to do it? One of the basic things is to set up trigger moments to activate your habits (Pull your triggers and Hack your triggers).

 

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POWER OF YOUR VISION

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vision
vision

Most people start from What they want to accomplish? Then they think How they will accomplish it? In the end only a small part gets to Why they want to do it - Simon Sinek

Let’s start from getting your answers to few questions. Yeah I know you don’t like to do it but bear with me. This is an investment in your future, your vision, your dream. The potential payoff is remarkable. It will be liquidated in most valuable currency there is. Your Happiness.

KICKOFF

Let’s kick it off. What do you want to achieve? Why do you want to achieve? To truly get excited and engaged with your vison you need to start from Why.  What is your Why? Why this goal is so important to you? How will you feel once you achieve it? What it will give you? How it’s going to change your life and the life of people around you? For whom are you doing this for? How would you feel if would fail? What failure is going to take away from you? Is failure even an option for you?

FIRE

What burns in your heart? What is your motive for action? What drives your life?

If you want to live up to your potential, you need to change. Change is never the matter of ability, it is always the matter of your motivation and will. You can start the process of change from tring to do something different for the next 30 days.  Do something different and you will discover again how exciting and propelling your life might me.

UNIQUE

We cannot change the circumstances but if we will start doing and behaving differently with the same circumstances we can change ourselves. We can change our thinking. We can change what we do. To have more you simply have to become more. Learn to work harder on yourself than you do on your job. Don’t wish that it was given to you, wish you have earned it.

THE SUMMIT

Journey to your vision will be most challenging endeavor in your life but don’t wish it was easier, wish you were better. If you will get through this, you will grow tremendously on the way up the mountain.  Don’t wish for less problems, wish for more skills. Don’t wish to start first, wish to finish first.

NO BULLSHIT

Your vision represents what you really, truly want. Not what you think you want or what you should have. Saying I’m going to stop eating fast foods, I’m going to stop smoking, I’m going to quit this job, is not inspiring at all. It’s only what you’re not going to do.

This kind of thinking will keep you in the same place. A vision is all about what you are going to create. The vision that really works is the one that excites you. It’s must have the power to pull you because you can only push yourself so far. To push you need willpower and will power never lasts because we only have a finite stock of willpower for each day.

THRILL

What you truly want is to have a vision, that’s going to make excited, that’s going to make you want to jump from the bed in the morning and stay up late. You will feel great about going at life versus being miserable. Going to the job you hate and just living your life that does not empower you. There is no power in it. There is no greatness. There is no joy and happiness in it.

PAINFULL FUTURE

I’m guilty of thinking about my future in this fashion. I’ve been in that place for the most part of my adult life. I didn’t have any kind vision about my future and I wasn’t even conscious of that. Living my life day by day, week by week, month by month. Never having time or energy to invest in my future or investing in my personal development. 

To be quite frank just thinking about the future was painful to me. There was nothing compelling or exciting about it. No plan, no vision, no bright future ahead of me. That was adding fuel to my fire of frustration, fear and disappointment.

BEHIND CLOSED DOORS

You need to have this vision because you will face the moments in your life when you will feel that the world is against you. Everything that could go wrong will go wrong. All doors will be closed but does it mean that you are not allowed to have what’s on the other side? Sometimes you will feel that the world closing on you. That’s the time when you need to take a closer look at your vision and stay committed to it. Be persistent on what you are going to do, but don’t be attached on how you are going to do it. The How changes and that how it needs to be. That’s nothing to be worried about. If this way doesn’t work, try something different.

BE NUTS!

SEE YOURSELF ALREADY THERE

Your vision, rather than being an outer creature, is an inner conviction. Your true calling is deep inside of you. Allow your dreams, hopes and images in your head to play in your mind. See the world through lens of your vision. See where you’re going and who you will become. See yourself already there. Feel, as you’re already there. Act, as you’re already there. Think, as you’re already there. Be the person you want to become. Be that person right NOW! I did it so you can too.

vision

JOURNEY OF A FOOL

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JOURNEY OF A FOOL
JOURNEY OF A FOOL

A fool thinks himself to be wise, but a wise man knows himself to be a fool - William Shakespeare

CONFESSION

I am a complete Fool. I haven’t been a fool some time ago but I am one now. Seriously that’s the thing I’m most certain about myself at this very moment.  And you know what? I’m proud to be a fool. I cherish it. I enjoy it. I love it with my entire body. I never thought I would be so happy to say that I AM A FOOL.

TICKET TO MY DREAM

That notion of being a Fool enlightened me just about 3 months ago. At that time, I have discorded that I’m a not a rookie Fool anymore. It’s the second year of this incredible Journey. It has all started with naive idea that I can actually change my life. That I can be me. That I can be happy. That there is something more. Buying this ticket to happiness came by the prize of fear of failure but I bought it anyway. Don’t expect it to be free! It will never be.

BAGGAGE

The Journey of a Fool started from change my mindset, raising my standards and making the Decision. The decision to leave my job. To leave making good money. To leave my professional experience. To leave everything I learned. Finding the courage to leave it all behind, while having two little kids, a big mortage and literally no idea what now. I was willing to take that step back to get my mental health and happiness back.   

PAINTING

What happened next? Well, many things happened but the only thing that mattered was what I did with it. Although I don’t know how to draw, I took those massive crayons and painted my life with the happiest possible colors. After years of living in greys and halftones I started living in a totally different painting. There was no place for tragedy or drama anymore. This picture is in my full control, under my responsibility and I have all the colors in my hands. I paint my past. I paint my reality. I paint my future, my vision and my dreams. The story and the quality of my painting is only up to me. Own your painting. Own it and paint whatever you can dream of. 

IT’S A SCAM

So many of us live in greys and halftones, just like I was. The most marvelous and unfortunately forgotten factor is to be a fool and dream! Be naive enough to dream, to have vision, to wonder on your Journey. Sometimes you have got to be nuts! The world wants us to be reasonable and rational but it’s highly overrated. It’s not what you expect. You’re buying a life you don’t want. You’re buying it because so many people bought before you. That’s still the same insanely overpriced product. It’s like buying this beautifully designed, highly practical and technologically perfect vacuum from a TV Store. Once you’ve got it delivered, unwrap it and plug it in, it becomes the biggest disappointment of your life. The more you use it, the worst it gets. Then you come to a point when it doesn’t work anymore. You stop dreaming, you stop expecting more from yourself, you stop trying. It’s very sad but you become a bystander of your own life. Don’t you ever let it happen.

BE A FOOL

From the start of our life we are told to grow up. Is it really a time to do it now? Well, it’s quite the opposite. Be a child again. Feel joy, feel curiosity by learning to switch off your good sense and judgment.

Who with a right mind would risk a failure? Who would risk pain? Who would risk embarrassment?  Only a fool. Be smart and brave enough to be one. Who would work really hard without a clear prize ahead? Only a fool. Don’t look around the next corner, look at the end of that road. Be patient. Your life is not a sprint, it’s an ultramarathon.

Who would ignore the past? Only a fool. Don’t be afraid to focus on present and the future.

JOURNEY OF A FOOL

GAME OF RULES

YOUR CHOISE

The way you live your life, will determine how many secrets you will discover. Pursuing knowledge and experience can only get you so far. To go all the way, you want to be a glorious dreamer.

Our world, our society, our companies and corporations praise conformity but there is a different choice for you. You don’t have to do it. Fight for your vision. Don’t give up on your Journey. Be Nuts. Be a Fool!

(Not) so SMART

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OVERCOMING FEAR OF FAILURE. PART 1

Logic will get you from A to B, imagination will get you everywhere – Albert Einstein

ARE YOU SMART?

Do you like to feel smart? How about your goals, do you like them to be smart?

SMART goals are a highly contagious mantra. It spreads very quickly throughout your body and mind. What’s more worrying is that it is a deadly disease. It’s deadly to your ambition, it’s deadly to your creativity, it’s deadly to your Vision.

We are constantly told that our goals need to be simple and achievable. As dehumanized corporation machine teaches us, our goal needs to be SMART – simple, measurable, achievable, relevant and time-based. As far as your personal life that’s a complete bullshit. Especially that idea of only aiming to what’s achievable now.

Your capabilities can change from in the matter of day. Sometimes you just need to go around the corner. Sometimes you just need another breakthrough. What was impossible and unimaginable yesterday, is within your reach today.  

You don’t have to live your life in cubicle of corporation mindset. It is so scary how our lives and our culture got fixed around SMART goals. Everything has got to be specific, measureable, attainable, realistic, time bound. Very powerful left brain thinking way. We are dominated by realism. Realistic goals, spread sheets, check lists, white boards all those things help us accomplish small tasks and tiny goals but nothing more. This path won’t take you to your dreams or your vision.

YOUR REALISM KILLS YOUR OPTIMISM?

You don’t have to live your life in cubicle of corporation mindset. It is so scary how our lives and our culture got fixed around SMART goals. Everything has got to be specific, measureable, attainable, realistic, time bound. Very powerful left brain thinking way. We are dominated by realism. Realistic goals, spread sheets, check lists, white boards all those things help us accomplish small tasks and tiny goals but nothing more. This path won’t take you to your dreams or your vision.

OVERCOMING FEAR OF FAILURE. PART 1

The greatest pleasure in life is doing what people say you cannot do – Walter Begehot

There is a down side to all that pragmatic and realistic thinking. Our goals and visions became so tiny, that often times there’s nothing compelling and inspiring about them. We are constantly conditioned to play by the rules and go along with everything that works already. I refuse to play by book and you should too.

HOW OFTEN DO YOU PLAY AGAINST ALL ODDS?

When was the last time you have shoot for the moon? Have you ever? Smart goals have nothing to do with your dreams. You are constantly limiting and restricting yourself by not dreaming big. Your chaining yourself to your present situation, present set of skills and knowledge, present life. If your goal is just a checklist you are not going to go for your dream. It has to be something that is compelling and important to you.

The biggest achievements in human history, most successful companies, biggest endeavors didn’t start with smart goals. There was nothing attainable or realistic about them. Those ideas were turning the world over. Was the dream of flying attainable when Wright brothers started going for it? Was it smart to think we are going to land on the moon? Those were impossible dreams.  You’re small thinking doesn’t benefit anyone.

WHAT’S THE WORST THING THAT CAN HAPPEN?
OVERCOMING FEAR OF FAILURE. PART 1

If we can’t handle the worst, then we don’t deserve the best – Anonymous

How far you can fall? Clearly define the worst thing and you will realize that the reality isn’t really that bad. Define the worst outcome and you’ll soon start to see how ridiculous most of your worries are. Get busy with what you love and your brain won’t have time to worry.

In every process you have to bring the goal down and measure it but don’t start from that. The time for being realistic, analytical and pragmatic will come later. Don’t be scared to think at the level that is ambitious, courageous, bold. Go to that place of uncertainty first and then you will find yourself where you really want to be. Sometimes you have to be nuts! Start with the dream and how to do it will come later.